A little closer to being a little littler

Yesterday morning I stood on the scale knowing that I had to have gained 50 pounds over the last two days. I have eaten like crap and was feeling like an even fatter turd than I already am. Not wanting to face off with my epic failure I decided to close my eyes and get on the scale.

To my amazement I had actually lost 2 pounds since last week. That’s right. I am now at 300.5 pounds. Yes, I am still fat. But I am losing weight still. And I am not trying that hard to do it.

So I made a promise to myself. I will start trying now. I have lost about 20 pounds without putting any real effort into it. Since that makes me sick just thinking about it, I believe now is a good time to start applying myself.

I am planning on making Friday mornings my official weigh-in morning. I am going to start charting, honestly, what my weight is so I can make a visible, conscious effort to maintain a steady loss. I am going to try to lose weight.

I have done this before. I have mentioned before that in 2002 I lost an incredible 107 pound between January and October of that year. It was a pretty consistent 2.5 pounds per week for 40 weeks. I want that again. I want to be the good looking, healthy, slender male what I was at the end of that run. I want to fit into a size 32 pants again. I want to be able to wear a size “L” shirt. I want to be able to shop at Macy’s. I want to be a better me physically.

I am committing myself to it. And I am a little nervous because I really have no time for me right now. I am just hoping that I will be able to steal myself away from everything else long enough to give myself some much needed attention. So the next time you are having drinks, toasting one another or otherwise remembering folks, remember me and wish me luck. I would really love to be able to write about this again months from now being 2/3 the size that I am now.